Posts Tagged ‘relationships’

Hold on Loosely by .38 Special, one of my favorites.  It came on the radio as I pulled in the driveway this afternoon.  It stimulated my thoughts on relationship, makes sense, that’s what the song’s about.  It’s a topic that’s important to me.  Finding that balance in a relationship where I feel like I have myself, my space, my life, my freedom yet I’m in a relationship.  I need my space.  I need alone time.  I’m an Aquarian, I think that’s part of it.  I also pick up a good bit of info through feeling.  So part of my alone time is about clearing and cleansing my field and staying in touch with myself.

At the beginning of relationships we have the eros.  That wonderful chemical high.  We can’t get enough and we feel like we’re floating on a cloud.  Then after a few months we adjust.  The light dims and certain realities rise to the surface.  This is where that heart connection is most important.  I thinks this is when you really start to develop the heart connection and you get the opportunity to work on your relationship issues/beliefs.

Hold on loosely.  That’s the theme here.  Love is a many faceted topic.  Let’s stick with one.  Ultimately I want a relationship that fits like a glove.  I know there will be some custom fitting to be worked out between us.  I need to know what I need and be able to state it clearly.  Letting someone in yet creating healthy boundaries.

That’s ultimately the challenge.  Take responsibility for ourselves and speaking up.  Good god you can’t expect your partner to read your mind.  Even if you can read each other pretty well, there’s a lot of interpretation that can get messed up.  I don’t care how psychic either of you think you are.  Our history and personal experiences cloud or color the story.  You really aren’t going to know the whole truth and nothing but the truth without a heart to heart conversation.  Many conversations, yea and some arguments.  Most likely some hurt feelings.  It gets messy sometimes.  The wonderful opportunity we have in all relationships is the remodeling job on ourselves.  You can’t remodel a home without making some mess.  I don’t think relationships are any different.

I’ve asked for space before in relationships without saying what that meant.  Honestly I can understand why it wasn’t met with a great reaction.  I was feeling like I had no time or space for myself and no choices.  My reaction was to pull away, my pulling away triggered his abandonment issues.  If you aren’t communicating clearly  misinterpretation and hurt feelings are inevitable.  Even when you think you are communicating clearly misinterpretation arises.

It’s a big topic.  I’ll leave it here for now.  Hold on loosely, AND communicate well.  If that still doesn’t cut it, you might just have to move on till you connect with someone that “gets” you better.  Someone that appreciates you, even with your quirks and issues.

Here’s .38 Special and Hold On Loosely

 

 

In Joy,

Susan

 

Yesterday a storm passed through my area.  The clouds rolled in quickly as I headed out to the library.  I didn’t get too far when I realized just how bad it was.  There wasn’t anything at the library worth driving right into a heavy storm for.  I got home and ran around securing windows, then outside getting my hanging planters down. Back inside, wet but safe.

I enjoy storms most of the time. This one stirred up a bit of fear. Enough to reach out to my family and make sure they were someplace safe. The worst passed quickly.

I started contemplating how storms crop up in our lives in different shapes and sizes.  Just like the weather storms these situations can feel scary and destructive.  They push our buttons and bring our fears to the surface like sea serpents.  If we get caught in the emotional turmoil we can feel like we are drowning.  We all find ourselves getting tossed about by our emotions sometimes.

I have been re-reading the book, Power vs Force by David Hawkins.

He created a consciousness scale by using kinesiology.  In his scale 200 is the critical line that distinguishes the positive and negative influences of life.  I had been having a tough time in a relationship with someone I had no choice but to deal with.  His energy feels forceful.  I called it being an energetic bully.  I didn't feel good being around this person and I never knew when he would energetically attack me.  My first negative experience with him felt like being punched in the stomach.  I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me.  It was nothing he physically did.  He lied to me to manipulate the situation and force himself into having the upper hand.  Hence my re-reading this book.

One of the things I thought I would try was to imagine a large pyramid over the space I was in.  I set the intention that the pyramid would adjust the energy so that anyone coming into the space would have to be at the level of 200 or above or at least willing to go there.  It has brought some interesting experiences.  I imagined the pyramid over the property, not just myself.

I had been focused on protecting myself from this person.  What came about was looking at my own integrity.  I had been holding money to benefit the group of people that I work with.  The money they would raise would just disappear at the corporate level.  It felt like an injustice and made me mad.  It had nothing to do with this current person.  It had been weighting on my mind and I didn't like being in the situation of keeping a secret.  Secrets create energetic tension, even if you keep a secret because you think you are helping.

Someone came along and resolved it for me.  The money was stolen.  Circumstances lined up that allowed that energy to be cleared.  My integrity began coming back into balance.  I felt a sense of relief even though I wasn't happy that it had been stolen.  The tension was relieved.

Storms serve a purpose in our lives.  We can make them a more positive experience if we take responsibility.  Use them to clear and cleanse.

I noticed a few other relationships undergoing some cleansing this week.  It's all good.  It just depends on how you look at it.

It's time to make some other changes, but right now I'm going to rest.

In Love,

Susan
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